What's the most Offensive word you can call a Jew?
Henry is on his deathbed and knows the end is near.
His nurse, his wife, his daughter and 2 sons, are with him.
He asks for 2 witnesses to be present and a camcorder be in place to
record his last wishes, and when all is ready he begins to speak:
My son, "John, I want you to take the Mayfair houses."
My daughter "Sybil, you take the apartments over in the east end."
My son, "Jamie, I want you to take the offices over in the City
"Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings on
the banks of the river."
The nurse and witnesses are blown away, never knowing the extent of his
property holdings, and as Henry slips away, the nurse says, "Mrs. Smith,
your husband must have been such a hard-working man to have accumulated
all this wealth".
Sarah replies, Wealth? .... Wealth!
He has a paper route!"
"I've often been asked, 'What do you do now that you're retired?'
"Well... I'm fortunate to have a chemical engineering background and one
of the things I enjoy most is converting scotch, wine and whiskey into
urine. It's rewarding, uplifting, satisfying and fulfilling. I do it
every day and I really enjoy it."
In 249 AD Julian, a native of Cilicia as we are informed by St. Chrysostom, was seized upon for being a Christian. He was put into a leather bag, together with a number of serpents and scorpions, and in that condition thrown into the sea.
All I can think of is the poor the office worker who was told, "Yeah... I'm gonna need you to get me a leather bag big enough to throw Julian in, and also a bunch of poisonous serpents and scorpions. And I need them in an hour. Oh, and I am gonna need you to work this weekend too. K."
A professor at Brown University says the drinking age in the U.S. should be lowered to 8 years old.
That'll sure make 3rd grade easier.
Issue of the Times;
The Fall of the Wall Almost Started WWIII by Eric Margolis
Twenty-five years ago this week, the Soviet empire in Eastern Europe was collapsing. The Berlin Wall had been breached. The Communist East German government was literally swept away by the storm tide of history.